Speaking of Spanking

By Chelsea Pfeiffer

Implements – From Sublime to Ridiculous

Not many spankers do all hand spanking all the time. I certainly don’t. But, when it comes to the kinds of implements people prefer the range goes from completely practical to completely NOT!

As a spanker, I like all kinds of implements and I’ve been known to use an implement or two that might fall in the ridiculous category. As a spankee, I don’t like any implements. (Well…you know what I mean. It’s a love/hate thing.) What I especially don’t like, as a spankee, are the ridiculous. Okay, so what do I consider sublime, or ridiculous? Here we go:

The hairbrush is one that I consider sublime. It’s practical and almost every household has one. As a spankee, it does indeed hurt, but it doesn’t make me feel silly. One can overplay the humiliation factor.

I think this steel re-enforced black leather strap is sublime. It’s not exactly practical. But, it was lovingly crafted by a true spanking enthusiast for maximum effect and it’s very sexy looking.

My favorite sublime implement is this beautiful blonde leather strap. Again, not usually found around the home, but crafted by one of the best in the spanking biz: London Tanners! As a spanker, I use this one often. It’s easy to aim and control and if you give it a good swing it really, really stings. Ouch!

This classic “school” style paddle is definitely sublime. It’s made to get the job done and it isn’t at all silly. I wouldn’t laugh if someone used it on me!

A slipper definitely falls into the ridiculous category. It’s just silly and, though probably effective, I would never use something on someone’s bare bottom that has seen the concrete streets, or the kitchen floor. YUK! How unsanitary.

A flip flop is all that the slipper is and possibly more. Ridiculous!


No offense to the fine craftsman who made this paddle, but I haven’t even been able to bring myself to use it. A butterfly shaped paddle? What? It floats like a butterfly, but stings like a bee? No. Definitely ridiculous.


This flower shaped paddle (though I have used it on occasion because it can cover an entire bottom in one swing) also falls into the ridiculous category. I called it the Flower Power Paddle when I used it. The second time I tried to use it, it nearly broke. Ridiculous.
On a short side note, the maker of these last two paddles makes some very, very fine paddles. If you’re interested go to: Paddlemastesrpro.com.


This triple cane is actually one of my favorites, or it was before Snow Mercy’s tough tushy exploded the tips of it. It looks kinda silly, but was extremely effective and easy to aim. Canes can be very difficult to aim!

I call this one the thwacker, because that’s what it sounds like when it meets a deserving butt. I’ve had it for years and I actually like using it. But, it’s very extreme and can only be used on a very hard player. I think it’s a palm frond that’s been smoothed out and shellacked over. Go figure

So, on those last two, feel free to chime in on whether you think they’re sublime, or ridiculous. Or, on any of the above mentioned implements for that matter. Do you agree, or disagree?