Some of my sessions are very complicated and involve a lot of equipment, planning, and in communication with my clients. Other encounters are simple and basic. Case in point: foot worship and spanking. The only “problem” with these is when the client starts to hint that compensation is no longer in order. In other words, we are both having a good time so why should I pay?
The rational from these clients is usually something along the lines of -we BOTH seem to derive intense enjoyment from the activity, and it would be so much more convenient to just drop by my house/have me come to his. I mean if there is something mutual going on, then why does money need to get involved?
Here’s why money needs to be involved and ultimately it’s a very good thing: Monetary exchange for an activity maintains boundaries that keep both parties happy in the long run. If all you can do is dwell on the COST, then you shouldn’t be doing the activity—I don’t care what it is. It’s an affordability issue and your budget is the mitigating factor. If you can afford the activity without worry and you don’t like the IDEA of paying, here are some things to consider.
Money keeps things simple. It guarantees that I show up on time, I have a clean, uncluttered location for us to meet, and we stick to the negotiated plan. Yes, I might not FEEL like showing up to our appointment, but I know what the agreement is so I get ready, show up and then am happier for it once things get rolling. Yes, that’s a newsflash to many: no matter how much I enjoy what I do, it’s still my work and there are days I don’t feel like going to work. The difference is that I KNOW I will have a good time once the session begins.
Money makes sure that too much information isn’t shared. I don’t know where you live and you don’t know where I do. You might share some details about your private life, but that’s not mandatory and most people don’t. Money makes it so we form our relationship around an activity that we both enjoy, and we don’t take it further. By having this narrow definition of how we interact, it means that we will continue to have focused enjoyment in the future. Boredom is more difficult if we are always on the cusp of getting to know more about each other, but never do.
Lastly, money also makes the conclusion of our relationship a clean process. Yes, really it does. If you have maintained your boundaries and you just stop seeing me, no harm no foul. You always have the option to return. Of course a less experienced Mistress might get her feelings hurt when a client stops seeing her, but that’s the realm of those who aren’t keeping this to a business mindset—and a whole ‘nother topic for me to write about!